In a few weeks (about two), a new chapter in my life will unfold. I will start my university education at the National University of Singapore. I will be majoring in the Life Sciences.
For 20 years of my life, I had worked hard for this, I had studied hard for this and now I am finally here. I thank Allah for everything that has ever happened that had helped me achieve this feat.
Enrolling into a university has always been a destination that my parents had set for me and a destination that I had set for myself. All the examinations, countless hours of studying and the sleepless nights throughout my 20 years of life was for this.
I guess, I haven’t really had the time to appreciate this moment, the success that I have finally achieved. It is a success that can never be fulfilled without the help of family, friends, teachers and Allah.
University is not going to be easy, that I know. It is going to be a tough 4 years but I know that I can survive through this like I always have. I believe that it is going to be an exciting 4 years full of memories, cherished moments and long-lasting friendships and as I had worked hard to reach where I am now, I hope to treasure every single moment.
Every single day, we hear the news of War in the world, the news of freedom fighters, rebels, soldiers on the ground fighting traitors, dictators, terrorists. They fight for peace, love, safety and security.
However, every single day, we wait for the news that never comes: The end of the wars and the arrival of peace.
Where then did we go wrong in our search for peace?
Is ‘searching’ for peace the wrong way to go about it or is there another way?
Should we even attempt to seek peace?
Maybe we are giving too much attention to these despots, criminals and vile creatures. Maybe we are actually feeding them the fuel they need to thrive, attention. Maybe we should instead ignore them and move on with our daily lives… but…
“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”
– Edmund Burke
So… now, I do not know what we can do for if we do something, mindless deaths will continue and if we don’t, evil will triumph.
Unless you’re a saint or a monk, I’m pretty sure all of us have been subjected to the pull of vanity or being vain. In a world where social media now runs our lives, where our image plays a part in our rank in the social hierarchy, where beauty is praised and ugly is shunned, where attention is needed to be successful, walking the path of vanity has become more enticing.
Recently, there was a half-naked photograph of me at the beach. It was a pretty nice photograph accentuating my back muscles and I had a dilemma, a dilemma that I had experienced before.
Previously, I also took a similar photograph but after a while of posting it on Instagram, I retracted it back.
I did the same for the recent one too.
I do not understand why but throughout the time the photograph was online for everyone to see, I felt insecure, I felt uncomfortable and I question why do I need to post such a photograph online. The photograph did not suit any purpose except to put me in a better light, to portray my physical prowess to the world. I did not feel comfortable with that.
The likes did come in, and maybe a part of me felt better that it did but after a while, I became numb to the dopamine.
It is vanity I said.
I decided that I should not let the feeling make me a slave to it.
So, I retracted the photograph and instantly I felt better. I guess, I just did not want to allow people to have the chance to judge me and question me, to allow myself to be exposed to the comments of others. It is as if I’m baring it all.
I guess, it all depends on the comfort level of each individual to post such photographs.
Never feel forced or compelled to do it which I believe is the most important thing.
Meeting new people has never been a thing of mine. I am always nervous and worried whenever there is an occasion that calls for me to introduce myself and make new friends. My palms will be sweaty and my mind will run into the many possible situations that could happen. My unconscious mind would prepare multiple introductory lines that I could use such as, “Why are you here?”, “Which school were you from?”, “Hello, my name is Hakim and I was from _____.”
So, when I was at the Life Sciences Camp, already armed and prepared with the questions and ready for awkwardness, I was surprised at how easily I conversed. There was no sudden weird awkwardness nor were there any weird antics that I did. I managed to contain myself and not allow my nervousness to control my actions.
Never thought that I would say this but meeting new people has been a wonderful experience. It is amazing how strangers could reveal a lot about themselves to each other and gain trust in just a span of a few days or even hours. We had heart-to-heart talks every evening until the early morning and it was wonderful, something that I have always loved doing.
Next week, I will be attending another camp and honestly, I am excited.
I made wonderful friends in the duration of that camp and I hope the friendship lasts.
Apologies, I am currently attending a Life Science Camp in my school, National University of Singapore.
So far, the events have been wonderful and fun. I’m glad that I have met wonderful people with wonderful personalities and I cannot wait for school to officially begin.
University struck me as complex and requires much independence on the part of the student and it is that flexibility and freedom that I cannot wait to experience. To finally be in charge of your owm education puts more accountability on me and thus, more driven to work hard for my future.
Well, this post will be considered as the post for yesterday and I will post another later in the evening. 🙂