Good Bye 2016, What’s Next?

I don’t know.

To be honest, that was what 2016 was like, full of I-Don’t-Knows.

2016 was wonderful and it was a year where I had learnt so much, made so many wonderful friendships and learnt truly a lot about myself and I guess, attained self-awareness.

2016 was the year I ORD-ed from serving the nation in the Singapore Civil Defence Force,
2016 was the year I became a student of the National University of Singapore,
2016 was the year that I’ve forged unexpected friendships (how I entered Silat without much consideration),
2016 was the year I opened myself up to many new things (joining two ad-hocs without much consideration),
2016 was the year I lived my dream of being a college student,
2016 was the year I started to put more focus into my writing,
2016 was the year I became obsessed with Casey Neistat and his art of vlogging,
2016 was the year I truly strived to be a better person,
2016 was the year that I squatted heavy (52.5KG per side),
Most importantly, 2016 was the year I hustled.

There are many things I’ve failed to achieve in 2016 but there are also many things that I achieved. There were also many detours and unexpected things that happened that made my 2016 so much more beautiful.

I’ll be posting up my goals and resolutions for 2017 and also a reflection on how my resolutions for 2016 had turned out to be.

P.S. However, in my opinion, 2016 had been bloody and brutal for the outside world, but 2016 was needed for the world to wake up.

Even though there might be things that we had hoped could have been better in 2016, let’s refresh ourselves and move forward to 2017 with renewed hope and vitality.

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Sudden, Death.

Losing someone you love suddenly is a painful thing to experience.

I just read a Facebook post where a man’s wife died (I’m unsure of the cause) on their one year anniversary of their marriage.

It felt like a spear just went through my heart when I read that. I cannot imagine how it would have felt to be the man himself.

The amount of pain of losing a soul mate, a partner that you’ve wished to live forever with, to me, is unimaginable.

Whatever it is, I was glad that the man took it in good faith, knowing that there is always a reason behind the actions of Allah SWT.

 

 

Seeking Repentance

The sins that we carry on our shoulders, the wrongs that we do every single day of our lives, can only be lifted when we seek repentance.

However, sometimes, it is easier said than done.

Seeking repentance is just the beginning of a whole journey that will bring you through small successes and sometimes, major failures.

I’m sure all of us have experienced the utter disappointment in our hearts when we relapsed a bad habit. Sometimes, that feeling will bring us to the point where we almost want to give up.

So, should we give in and give up?

No.

In Islam, we believe that all of our prayers will be answered one way or another. However, they differ in the ways that it can be answered.

What we can and should do is to make an intention to repent, pray to Allah SWT and have deep and strong faith that he listened and that he will reply.

He will assist you in what you are searching for if you are sincere in your repentance.

Maybe I have doubted the power of a supplication all this while and maybe what I can do now is to have renewed faith and be more conscious of my intentions, especially those related to repentance.

Do I really want to repent?

 

True Intentions

Be it good or bad, everyone has their intentions when they are doing or about to do something.

We just don’t know what they are.

Maybe, they might not even be conscious of what their true intentions are, themselves.

To be conscious of your intentions when doing something is truly important. One example is the intention to do charity. If your intention to do charity is to help others and make the life of others better, then, that is good. However, there are some whose intentions are to build their own image in the eyes of the public, to make themselves look philanthropic when in actual fact, they aren’t.

True intentions lie deep within oneself and only if one asks himself the question of their intentions can it be revealed.

Sometimes, intentions are hidden deep beneath piles of lies and deceits and thus, we are not conscious of what is driving our actions. Maybe, they are hidden under the lies we tell ourselves of what we want to be instead of who we truly are. We want so much to be how we envisioned ourselves to be that we would rather lie to ourselves than work hard to achieve it.

This is a problem that many face every single day, even me. However, it can be eradicated, only with an increase in self-awareness; understanding who we are and who we aren’t.

 

Year-End Anxiety

As the year slowly comes to an end, there seemed to be a rush to cherish every single moment of 2016, a rush to ensure that every moment is spent wisely.

For me, ironically, it seemed to be a rush to ensure that I have rested adequately before the new year begins.

I mean, it totally is something expected, seeing that this holiday I was (and still am) busy with projects and whatnot thus, not really getting real, true slacking time.

I mean, I just have this urge to ensure that I am energised and ready to go for the new year but obviously, this anxiety just prevents me from doing just that.

I’m just afraid that when the new year rolls around, I will still be my tired, exhausted 2016 self. That is something I desperately want to avoid. I want my 2017 self to be fresher, more clear-headed, and motivated.

I have several things left to do before 2017, but I’m going to make sure that whatever is left of 2016 is not wasted and that I can start the new year fresh.

What does it mean to modernise?

In this age of technological advancement and progress, we may call it the modernisation of the human era from small villages to large metropolitan cities.

However, what does it truly mean to modernise?

What is modernisation if one only progress in technology but regress in our culture and society?

What does it mean to have high-tech equipment lying around if our souls are going back to the age of the cavemen?

What is the point of modernisation at all if we, as humans, do not progress in our spirituality and mental health?

Wouldn’t we just be intelligent cavemen? Could we even be called intelligent if our societies are in tatters but the only thing we’re good at is technology?

Hmm…