What do I want now?

I’m running away from things that I shouldn’t have the need to run away from.

It seems as if she’s the only one that matter and that I’m willing to give up everything else for her. I don’ t think that is right but that’s unfortunately how I feel. It is ridiculous I know.

Today it felt kind of numb. Not sure why but as if it all did not matter in the end but I’m afraid that if I were to see something that reminds me of her again, I would just ball my eyes out. Well… maybe not ball but you know.

Anyway, today I had a shoot for one of my friends back in National Service. He has been in the relationship with his wife (now) for like 7 years and alhamdulillah, it went smoothly. I’m glad. They decided to be more halal a year ago, I think when they finally decided to tie the knot, and it was awe-inspiring. The girl went through the transition smoothly and she embraced Islam with her whole heart. She doesn’t seem to be the kind that takes Islam lightly and I’m just so happy for him. May he able to guide her as her husband well, insyaAllah.

But that’s not what I’m amazed of. What amazed me was how humble his procession was. No loud kompangs, no loud music, no random long-lost uncle/auntie that they only meet once a year but just the close ones, the people that actually mattered. It was such a humble event and it amazes me how laid back they were. The parents too are super supportive and happy with the small event and it just goes to show that you don’t need to spend so much money for a ‘grand’ wedding. I guess such a set-up is an option for myself in the future (whenever that may be). Regardless, it is such a humble wedding and I’m just so happy for them.

I hope to find someone as supportive as they are of one another and to find someone that I can be 120000% comfortable with. 🙂


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