I don’t get to say this often because I don’t know who to tell it to but I feel that there are many people around me that are facing so much problems in their lives in relation to love… especially unrequited love. I feel that with every of such situation, there is a certain degree of expectation and when those expectations were not met, they destroyed themselves and questioned their worth.
I feel that fundamentally it is because they have attached their love too much to the creation that they forget about the real love which is to the Creator. I mean, I myself have faced that before. To attach my own heart to the creation will just bring disappointment. This is because the creation is not perfect and it can never provide us with what we want. Ultimately, to love someone, we have to love Allah SWT first. Not even loving ourselves but loving Allah SWT. Why? Because if we were to love ourselves first, we can get obsessed and be disappointed sometimes because of our own limitations. Our minds might expect us to be a certain way but there will always be that tendency for us to act other than what we expect. There are also certain physical limitations that we might have and thus, leading to a disconnect between the mind and the body. Ultimately, there will always be that risk of disappointment.
Unfortunately, many of us are stuck in that cycle of loving the creation so much such that when that other person no longer want to be in the relationship anymore, they destroyed themselves as if a part of them had died. The attachment that they had with that other person broke their heart and all the dreams, expectations and hopes vanished. I think I blogged about that once. I felt like I died. Like my heart is completely numb. It sucks because you literally felt like you’re being torn apart and the emotional pain that was felt materialised into real pain that was felt in the chest.
Love for the creation is truly a drug.
And most of us are unknowingly addicted to it.
And so, how does one love Allah SWT?
By loving His Messenger SAW for he is the best of creation and one whose steps we can try to emulate, insyaAllah.