Chaos

Finding structure in chaos.

When I think about chaos, I imagine a dark whirling tornado that warps the fabric of space and time.

A deep kind of darkness where nothing escapes its grasp, not even light.

Chaos.

It would be an overstatement to say that my life is in that current state, however, it would be an¬†understatement not to. But you won’t see it because it’s all in my mind.

I cannot see structure in this chaos that threatens to consume me whole,

All I could see is the dying light that is tinkling like shining gold.

It would be great if I could just find structure,

In this state of disaster,

At least something that can help me,

Through the rest of the semester.

A Rainy Day

It was pouring.

I arrived in school, drenched.

It was really cold.

But it was beautiful.

The howling of the wind, the growling of thunder, the sound of the rain beating against the roof. It was like a call for contemplation.

It was so peaceful too. Rainy days bring such a wonderful mood to a place. A mood of calm and relaxation. Some people talked idly about their lives in almost hushed tones, some complaining about the rain, but all in all, I guess, they were glad that it rained.

I personally loved the rain. The intense chaos of it ironically brings much peace to the mind. I guess it had something to do with how the weather kept the sky cloudy, and oh, have I talked about the wonderful smell of rain?

Well, I digress.

Today was a great day. Amidst the chaos of the mind and the confusion of the soul for the past few days, I managed to rally myself up and get some work done. Alhamdulillah.

I need to remind myself of my purpose in university and of my goals and intentions. I need to renew my motivation and drive.