Tonight, I’m going to be frank with you.
Recently, self-doubt has slowing been creeping up on me. I started to question my capabilities, my efforts and my strengths.
I began to question whether I am able to do this student thing, whether I am able to succeed in it, and whether I’m putting enough effort like the rest of the students.
I feel as if my life is slowly breaking apart.
I don’t feel motivated as of late. Instead, I feel frustrated and disappointed. Every single day seemed to be yet another worthless, unproductive one.
Furthermore, everybody else seems to be doing better than myself.
I haven’t met any of my expectations and every single thing that I do is followed by an unwavering sense of disappointment.
I’m slowly being crushed, not by work, but by my inability to control my own mind and body.
Honestly, I just don’t know what works anymore. Exercise, coffee, sleep, whatever.
A day is no longer enough to complete anything and I’m frustrated because of that.
I need to get my sh*t back together, and soon.
Honestly, I can tell myself that for millions of times but it is very unlikely that in the next few posts I’d get my life back together.