Just Three Questions When You’re Down

When you’re down, do this.

I promise that it’ll only take a minute.

I promise that you’ll feel better afterwards.

Just three questions.

  1. Who do you care about? 
    Recall the happy memories that you had with them, the smiles, the laughter, that fuzzy feeling that you feel inside.
  2. What are you grateful for?
    Think about the shelter above your head, the bed that you sleep on every night, the food that you eat, the job that you have, the people around you.
  3. What keeps you going?
    Think about the things that motivate you to persevere in life. They can be a goal that you want to achieve, a person that you care about or even a self-responsibility that you have for yourself.

Smile because there are worse things that could’ve happened to you.

 

 

The Thing About Change

It doesn’t come easy.

It doesn’t come instantly.

It requires perseverance.

It requires patience.

It requires hard work.

It requires small increments.

It requires strength.

It requires persistence.

 

Only those who are willing to go through it all will make a change, whatever it might be.

 

It’s All About Fitting In, Isn’t It?

Isn’t it?

Since we first enter school, all of us just wants to fit in, to be part of the crowd, to be accepted.

So, we decided to do all kinds of things that would allow us to be accepted. We dress differently, we change the way we talk, we do dumb things.

But is it all worth it?

Fitting in?

Maybe, maybe not.

Fitting in gives us a sense of social acceptance, knowing that we are part of a larger group. We are social creatures, we feel safer around others. By fitting in, we can depend on others for help, for comfort and maybe in evolutionary terms, for our own safety.

However, is there a fine line that we need to draw between being socially accepted into a group and discarding our unique identity?

Each of us is a unique individual with our own set of quirks and talents. As unique as we are as individuals, there is always an interest of ours that connects us with some other individual out there, a common interest.

Many individuals come together to form a social group. The personality of that group depends on the type of people that make up that group. A group full of motivated individuals would be motivated, a group full of artists would be highly inclined in creativity, and a group full rednecks would be loud, obnoxious and insane.

The fine line has to be drawn when that group starts to devour you, putting pressure on you to change against your own free will. They impose on you that you have to act a certain way, do certain things or dress a certain way to be accepted into the group.

I personally think that if you start to feel like you are not yourself, you are no longer being accepted but being controlled. Don’t think that you are fitting in when you’re in that situation. Find others.

I feel that being accepted shouldn’t come with unnecessary pressure to change and be someone else. The group should embrace you for being who you are and not wishing who you are not.

Find that group that you fit in naturally and not one that is artificial.

How Are You?

Sometimes, we just need to take a moment and ask ourselves, how are we?

It has been a long week for me.

Every free time I have is occupied by schoolwork and revision. Also, I feel that there is always something for me to do. I guess, I don’t really want to waste time doing things that do not bring value.

Furthermore, my days end pretty late into the night and I do not really have time to think and write or to just be plain creative (something that I really missed).

But what is more important is that I did not really have the time to ask myself if I’m all right.

Because, yesterday, I cried.

I’m not sure if you have listened to Quranic recitations but let me tell you that they are able to move you even if you do not understand a word. Furthermore, if the reciter has a beautiful voice along with his mastery of the pronunciation and the proper intonation of the Quran, he will be able to make you cry, like I did.

I guess it was the feeling of guilt and sin that surfaced. The feeling that I’m not doing enough to better myself. The realisation that all the problems that I am experiencing now are because of me and not anyone else.

And, I have to change.

It is the time to draw the line, to say that enough is enough and to move forward.

Sometimes, we just need a little time to be in touch with our inner selves, the innocent soul within all of us, to just be our own greatest motivator when no one else will.

Even though I was really tired at that point in time, I’m glad that I was able to release all that emotion and to have a conversation with my soul.

I think it is truly beneficial.

So, take a moment, just a wee bit moment, to ask yourself, ‘How Are You?’

 

When You Lose Control

What do you do if you can’t even control your own body?

 

I’m suffering.

In my own body.

It’s mechanisms, working, moving by itself.

It is a futile effort to stop it, to control it,

for when it begins,

it will never stop.

 

Only a will of iron,

or a heart that doesn’t tire,

can save me.

 

But I did it before,

stopping,

controlling,

but my body overcame my willpower,

and I fell back into that treacherous hole,

that I had once climbed out of.

 

It is lonely in here,

with no one to talk to,

not a soul to hear,

but only shadows that I fear,

creeping slowly towards me.

 

I’m afraid,

that every moment I spent in here,

is a moment closer,

to me,

being consumed by it,

consumed by my body,

that has a mind of its own.

Momentum

All of us know the pain of starting again, the amount of effort we need to take that first step.

But all of us also know the ease that comes after that first step.

Like the start of a new exercise routine, one has to put in a lot of effort to attend that first gym session or to eat healthily but after a while, as momentum begins to pick up, the task becomes automated, instinctive and easy.

We can apply that thought process for almost every new thing that we want to embark on.

Instead of dreading that first step and the assumed ‘pain’ that comes with it, just do it. Take that first step and push forward.

Build that momentum up and soon you will realise that everything would be easy.

I am building up that momentum for my university and I am especially struggling with the change of pace and lifestyle. However, I know that once I’ve properly built the necessary foundations, everything will feed off of that momentum and go full automatic.

So, put off that thought of dread and ‘suffering’. Just take that first step.

 

Don’t Fear Failure, Fear Mediocrity

My brother has a shirt that says,

“Don’t Fear Failure, Fear Mediocrity”

Most of us, whether we want to admit it or not, experience fear. We fear many things, from the safety of our own lives to the possibility of losing everything in our future. Most of the time, that fear arises when a choice is given to us. A choice of whether to change or remain the same, a choice of whether to experience something new or stay in our own comfortable circle, a choice of whether to take the risk or stay safe.

Because we fear change, we fear to get out of our comfort zones, we fear the uncertainties that lie ahead, we fear the failure that might come.

But we need to know that failure shouldn’t be feared instead, it should be revered because only through failure can one learn and improve. Therefore, what we need to fear instead is mediocrity, to fear of staying the same, unchanging, stagnant.

Most of us settle for mediocrity, we settle for being average, a part of the crowd even though, deep within, we have the potential to achieve so much more. The fear of failure binds us, paralyses us to remain the same, to be mediocre.

But that shouldn’t be the case anymore.

Because there are now so many examples of people overcoming that fear of failure and achieve great successes. People that were once paralysed by it now love to fail. People that now understood the importance of fearing mediocrity instead of failure because if you want to be different and if you want to truly stand out, we need to know what we should really fear.