It’s All About Fitting In, Isn’t It?

Isn’t it?

Since we first enter school, all of us just wants to fit in, to be part of the crowd, to be accepted.

So, we decided to do all kinds of things that would allow us to be accepted. We dress differently, we change the way we talk, we do dumb things.

But is it all worth it?

Fitting in?

Maybe, maybe not.

Fitting in gives us a sense of social acceptance, knowing that we are part of a larger group. We are social creatures, we feel safer around others. By fitting in, we can depend on others for help, for comfort and maybe in evolutionary terms, for our own safety.

However, is there a fine line that we need to draw between being socially accepted into a group and discarding our unique identity?

Each of us is a unique individual with our own set of quirks and talents. As unique as we are as individuals, there is always an interest of ours that connects us with some other individual out there, a common interest.

Many individuals come together to form a social group. The personality of that group depends on the type of people that make up that group. A group full of motivated individuals would be motivated, a group full of artists would be highly inclined in creativity, and a group full rednecks would be loud, obnoxious and insane.

The fine line has to be drawn when that group starts to devour you, putting pressure on you to change against your own free will. They impose on you that you have to act a certain way, do certain things or dress a certain way to be accepted into the group.

I personally think that if you start to feel like you are not yourself, you are no longer being accepted but being controlled. Don’t think that you are fitting in when you’re in that situation. Find others.

I feel that being accepted shouldn’t come with unnecessary pressure to change and be someone else. The group should embrace you for being who you are and not wishing who you are not.

Find that group that you fit in naturally and not one that is artificial.

When You Lose Control

What do you do if you can’t even control your own body?

 

I’m suffering.

In my own body.

It’s mechanisms, working, moving by itself.

It is a futile effort to stop it, to control it,

for when it begins,

it will never stop.

 

Only a will of iron,

or a heart that doesn’t tire,

can save me.

 

But I did it before,

stopping,

controlling,

but my body overcame my willpower,

and I fell back into that treacherous hole,

that I had once climbed out of.

 

It is lonely in here,

with no one to talk to,

not a soul to hear,

but only shadows that I fear,

creeping slowly towards me.

 

I’m afraid,

that every moment I spent in here,

is a moment closer,

to me,

being consumed by it,

consumed by my body,

that has a mind of its own.

Who Am I?

This is a question most of us will ask ourselves some time in our lives. Who Am I? Who Are You?

Am I the combination of both my father and mother or the average of them? Am I the average of the 5 people I’m closest to? Am I what I enjoy, food, books and family? Am I the person people think I am or the person I think people think I am? Hmm… what about this, am I what society made me or am I what society labelled me?

Who Am I???

There are many factors that affect who we think we are and affect what make us who we are, from the community we grow in to the videos on the internet that we watch. These factors influence our choices and decisions that we make, they influence our likes and dislikes and most notably, they affect our interests. You might be interested in making music one day after watching a rock star perform but later on, you might instead be interested in science because you find it fascinating.

However, this is not to say that we are the product of our environment but instead, that our environment plays a huge role in making us who we are as a person.

I believe that the definition of who we are is always changing, always evolving from one state to the next as we continue to learn and discover new things. Our interests change with time and thus, also who we are.

I understand that sometimes it is difficult to find out our true selves, our true passions, our true character, but fret not, because ultimately, we choose who we want to be, who we strive to be. God had given us free will to allow us to choose who we want to become and not what society tells us who we are.

You are you so do you and don’t try to be anyone else.

Reminders for Me

You may read it, you may sometimes even enjoy it but most of the articles that I write are reminders, reminders for myself.

I need reminders, constant reminders.

Reminders to change, reminders to stay motivated, reminders of my purpose here on planet Earth.

Each article, embedded within is a reminder for myself, my past, present and future self.

And the constant reminders keep me grounded, grounded on my identity and the person who I truly want to be.

I will carry on reminding myself, reminding myself to be a better person, as close to perfection as possible.

And I look forward to the day that my reminders pay off.

Cheers.

Only a Single Step is Needed

 

I have been watching 30 Days of Genius hosted by Chase Jarvis on CreativeLive almost every day in the past month and there is a recurring theme across most of the geniuses that he interviewed: They took a single step forward.

What do I mean?

These geniuses no matter who they may be from established authors to painters or entrepreneurs, all of them took a single step forward into better themselves in their own craft. They were able to reverse-engineer their goals into many different parts and took the time to understand what is required of them to achieve it. They asked people who know, they listened to their intuition when they are lost and the did what they felt right. They took that single step forward as a beginner with no knowledge whatsoever with no idea where this journey will end up. They took that single step forward listening to their intuition and understanding that whatever pain that they will face is going to be something that they have to endure.

Well, all of us know where they end up. Now, they are real-life examples of successes that can only happen if one were to take that single step forward. So, I challenge you to take that single step forward.

It’s One of Those Days

Demotivated, crushed and self-doubt creeping in slowly… such are the signs of one of ‘Those’ days.

You might be practising gratitude and a 20-minute meditation as you usually do every morning but on one of those days, you just feel different. Your mind is all clogged up, you cannot think straight, you feel completely unmotivated and lazy, and your whole body is just telling you to stop doing anything.

No matter what you try to do to solve it and start the day afresh, it always turns out to be futile. You tried taking a shower, eating a full meal, exercise and even a nap but you just get that feeling of dread and tiredness.

Unfortunately, I have no solution that I can share with you but I am pretty sure such days come in cycles. Sadly for me, today was such a day. I woke up feeling bloated and tired, I tried eating proper but that did not help, that too with drinking lots of water. My head feels like it is being pounded continuously and the back of my eyes hurt when I look at the screens of my devices. I decided to then take a break from electronic devices and started reading a book. It felt a wee bit better but not as much as I hoped for. My stomach still feels bloated even as I am writing this article.

I hate such days because I can never put my mind to do what I have to do.

Well… that is all that I can say and I hope that this feeling will come to pass.

Tomorrow will be a better day.