Just Three Questions When You’re Down

When you’re down, do this.

I promise that it’ll only take a minute.

I promise that you’ll feel better afterwards.

Just three questions.

  1. Who do you care about? 
    Recall the happy memories that you had with them, the smiles, the laughter, that fuzzy feeling that you feel inside.
  2. What are you grateful for?
    Think about the shelter above your head, the bed that you sleep on every night, the food that you eat, the job that you have, the people around you.
  3. What keeps you going?
    Think about the things that motivate you to persevere in life. They can be a goal that you want to achieve, a person that you care about or even a self-responsibility that you have for yourself.

Smile because there are worse things that could’ve happened to you.

 

 

It’s All About Fitting In, Isn’t It?

Isn’t it?

Since we first enter school, all of us just wants to fit in, to be part of the crowd, to be accepted.

So, we decided to do all kinds of things that would allow us to be accepted. We dress differently, we change the way we talk, we do dumb things.

But is it all worth it?

Fitting in?

Maybe, maybe not.

Fitting in gives us a sense of social acceptance, knowing that we are part of a larger group. We are social creatures, we feel safer around others. By fitting in, we can depend on others for help, for comfort and maybe in evolutionary terms, for our own safety.

However, is there a fine line that we need to draw between being socially accepted into a group and discarding our unique identity?

Each of us is a unique individual with our own set of quirks and talents. As unique as we are as individuals, there is always an interest of ours that connects us with some other individual out there, a common interest.

Many individuals come together to form a social group. The personality of that group depends on the type of people that make up that group. A group full of motivated individuals would be motivated, a group full of artists would be highly inclined in creativity, and a group full rednecks would be loud, obnoxious and insane.

The fine line has to be drawn when that group starts to devour you, putting pressure on you to change against your own free will. They impose on you that you have to act a certain way, do certain things or dress a certain way to be accepted into the group.

I personally think that if you start to feel like you are not yourself, you are no longer being accepted but being controlled. Don’t think that you are fitting in when you’re in that situation. Find others.

I feel that being accepted shouldn’t come with unnecessary pressure to change and be someone else. The group should embrace you for being who you are and not wishing who you are not.

Find that group that you fit in naturally and not one that is artificial.

When You Lose Control

What do you do if you can’t even control your own body?

 

I’m suffering.

In my own body.

It’s mechanisms, working, moving by itself.

It is a futile effort to stop it, to control it,

for when it begins,

it will never stop.

 

Only a will of iron,

or a heart that doesn’t tire,

can save me.

 

But I did it before,

stopping,

controlling,

but my body overcame my willpower,

and I fell back into that treacherous hole,

that I had once climbed out of.

 

It is lonely in here,

with no one to talk to,

not a soul to hear,

but only shadows that I fear,

creeping slowly towards me.

 

I’m afraid,

that every moment I spent in here,

is a moment closer,

to me,

being consumed by it,

consumed by my body,

that has a mind of its own.

Who Am I?

This is a question most of us will ask ourselves some time in our lives. Who Am I? Who Are You?

Am I the combination of both my father and mother or the average of them? Am I the average of the 5 people I’m closest to? Am I what I enjoy, food, books and family? Am I the person people think I am or the person I think people think I am? Hmm… what about this, am I what society made me or am I what society labelled me?

Who Am I???

There are many factors that affect who we think we are and affect what make us who we are, from the community we grow in to the videos on the internet that we watch. These factors influence our choices and decisions that we make, they influence our likes and dislikes and most notably, they affect our interests. You might be interested in making music one day after watching a rock star perform but later on, you might instead be interested in science because you find it fascinating.

However, this is not to say that we are the product of our environment but instead, that our environment plays a huge role in making us who we are as a person.

I believe that the definition of who we are is always changing, always evolving from one state to the next as we continue to learn and discover new things. Our interests change with time and thus, also who we are.

I understand that sometimes it is difficult to find out our true selves, our true passions, our true character, but fret not, because ultimately, we choose who we want to be, who we strive to be. God had given us free will to allow us to choose who we want to become and not what society tells us who we are.

You are you so do you and don’t try to be anyone else.

The Only Barrier Left

I’m sure most of us heard of the quote:

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

— Jim Rohn

Whether we like it or not, we are greatly influenced by the people and the environment around us. You can recognise this by being conscious that slowly the characters and traits of the people around you are slowly being rubbed off on you. A great example is the usage of vulgarities. You might be a person that do not usually use vulgarities but after spending a lot of time with a specific group of friends, you picked up the habit in your everyday speaking, their character rubbing off on you.  I had an experience with that.

I was never a person who uses vulgarities and I don’t think I ever will but when I was surrounded by a group who constantly use vulgarities, it was inevitable that some of that will be rubbed off on me. Fortunately, I was conscious about the change and managed to stop myself from using such foul language.

What we can learn from this is that we are who our company are. If we want to be successful, we must spend more time with people who are successful likewise for wanting to be smart or ambitious. Therefore, take a look at who you are spending most of your time with, list their traits and how much they are affecting your life. Do not be afraid to spend less time with them if you deemed them as negative influences because they might be the only barrier left to bring down before you can finally taste success.

Reminders for Me

You may read it, you may sometimes even enjoy it but most of the articles that I write are reminders, reminders for myself.

I need reminders, constant reminders.

Reminders to change, reminders to stay motivated, reminders of my purpose here on planet Earth.

Each article, embedded within is a reminder for myself, my past, present and future self.

And the constant reminders keep me grounded, grounded on my identity and the person who I truly want to be.

I will carry on reminding myself, reminding myself to be a better person, as close to perfection as possible.

And I look forward to the day that my reminders pay off.

Cheers.

All Of Us Have Secrets

All of us have secrets. Secrets that are so dark that it could threaten our current reputation. Secrets that can be so dangerous that if anybody were to know about them, our life as we know it would end.

Also, some of us have secrets that we regret. Secrets due to crimes that we have committed in the past when we were young and reckless. It does not matter what religion or school of thought that we adhere to, but all of us, one way or another, committed an act that is seen as disgraceful and embarrassing in the eyes of the public and thus, required to keep it a secret. However, the good thing about secrets is that secrets are not known to the public unless you said it out yourself. No one can force the truth out of you and you have the right to keep it to yourself.

It is in fact very dangerous for someone else to know our secrets as it might be used against us if we so happen to be hated.

However, some of us want to move on from the secrets we keep. We can no longer tolerate the emotional burden that comes along with it. We want to forget about it and restart afresh. However, that is like asking a fish to climb a tree. It is impossible. Secrets are a part of who we are. The emotional stress and burden that comes along with it, especially painful secrets, shapes us into who we are today, both the good and the bad. Remove secrets and we are no longer ourselves. Therefore, I personally think that instead of attempting to forget our secrets, we should instead view them from a different angle, we should learn from them.

All of us have secrets, they can bring us down and destroy us or you can ally with them and grow into a better human.